The Howard Stern show is the biggest and best radio show in the world. Most people know at least who Howard is, and it's the big reason I switched to SIRIUS satellite radio, although now that i have it, i've found alot of great other stuff. Here's a list of the main players on the show. All Stern-fans have people they love to hear and people they can't stand, and I'm no different. I've rated them with Howard 100 Fists.

Ratings
		"You Little Bitch!"
		"Who? Me?"
		"Oh My!"
		"Hey Now!"

Name: Howard Stern Job: Personality/Host Catch Phrase: Hey now!

The self proclaimed 'King of All Media' probably deserves a grand title, if maybe not that one. He's the reason the show exists, and he's still after all these years the best part of it. Great at interviews, great at getting people to do what he wants (and what needs to get done.) Everyone who walks in the room respects him, even if they don't like him - he really commands.

Name: Robin Quivers Job: Personality/News Catch Phrase: (laughter) Robin is pretty much the #2 person on the show. What's good about her is she brings a female side to topics and makes people being interviewed more comfortable. She's not as great as alot of the other show members, but she's probably the only one who's focused enough to get through the news.	Name: Artie Lange Job: Personality/Comedian Catch Phrase: FIIRE!! Artie is a great addition to the show. He doesn't overstep his position, and usually only speaks when spoken to. He usually has something funny to say or a humorous remark to something someone says. On SIRIUS he's gotten a little more vulgar which actually kinda works against him.
Name: Fred Norris Job: Sound Effects/Music Catch Phrase: none Fred has been working with Howard for the longest out of everyone on the show. He does all the sound effects in the background, and is top-notch 99% of the time. The only thing that brings him down is when he talks. He's really weird, and when he gets angry it's almost scary how crazy he seems.	Name: Gary Del'Abate Job: Producer Nickname: Baba Booey Gary does whatever Howard says. He will go wherever told and call whoever. He can be pretty funny, but his best asset is that he draws lots of humorous attacks on him and takes it. The whole Baba Booey thing in itself is great.
Name: Benji Bronk Job: Writer Catch Phrase: none Not counting the Wack Packers, Benji is the most disgusting person on the show. He's a writer and usually isn't heard that much. When he is, I usually don't like him, but every once in awhile he's funny. He must write funny stuff since he's still on the show (I can't tell what his material is.) It's great though when he's in the spotlight, getting attacked by the crew.	Name: Scott Salem Job: Engineer Nickname: Scott the Engineer Scott is usually off-mic, working the board. When he is on the show, he's annoying, unless it's when he's screaming-mad. But he's another good punching bag for the show.
Name: Richard Christy Job: Writer/Bits Catch Phrase: none Richard Christy is one of the newest additions to the show, and so far he's been worth it. First off, he's an amazing drummer. Ok, that doesn't really mean anything but still, kinda cool. He does alot of bits and song parodies by himself, but he's best when paired with Sal.	Name: Sal Governale Job: Writer/Bits Nickname: Sal the Stockbroker Sal does many song parodies and bits on his own, but he's best when paired up with Richard Christy. He's more high strung than Richard, and thus can't take alot of the criticisms from the crew, making him less funny than his partner.
Name: Ronnie Mund Job: Limo Driver/Security Nickname: Ronnie the Limo Driver Ronnie is not cool. Whenever he's on he's defending himself. I don't like him on the show, but then again, I don't hate him like other people further down this list.	Name: Ralph Cirella Job: Stern's Stylist Catch Phrase: none Ralph is one of Howard's closest friends, and when he calls in or shows up on the show, his raport with Howard is great. He's great when rating women who want to be rated for Playboy. The audience generally hates him, and I guess I can see how he can be kinda annoying.

The Greats
Name: Lester Green Nickname: Beetlejuice Catch Phrase: H-hey! Who? Me? If Howard wasn't on the show, Beet would be my favorite. Everytime he's on he's great. He's a dwarf little person, and has a little head. He gets confused real easily, and his lies are legendary. Hopefully he's not getting too big for his britches.	Name: Eric Bleaman Nickname: High Pitch Eric Catch Phrase: Who's High Pitch? This is Kelly Clarkson. High Pitch is a huge disgusting man who talks in a high pitched voice. I don't know if it's a joke or not, because I've heard him impersonate people in a low, normal voice. Nevertheless, he's usually good for a laugh. When he makes phony phone calls, his high voice is too funny.
Name: Eric Lynch Nickname: Eric the Midget Catch Phrase: ...Howard... Let me first say that Eric himself is not funny. He doesn't seem to have a sense of humor. But he believes that whatever he wants he should get, and for some reason, Howard likes to help him out. He's been a guest on one of his favorite TV shows (American Dreams) and he's met his celebrity crush (Kelly Clarkson.) But it's not enough for him, he wants more. His phone calls are super material for the crew to goof on.	Name: Jeff Curro Nickname: Jeff the Drunk Catch Phrase: You little bitch! What an apt name "Jeff the Drunk" is for Jeff. I've never heard him not in full-slurring-drunk mode. His falls are classic. His interjections are funny too ("You little bitch" being the best.)
Name: Mark ?? Nickname: Mark the Bagger Catch Phrase: Yes Mark the Bagger is a little guy with a crazy voice brought to the show by the band, The Bloodhound Gang. He is an actual bagger at a grocery store, and apparently has had homosexual tendencies. He's a little on the slow side, and says "Yes" alot. Whenever he opens his mouth it's incredibly funny because of his voice (a combination of Gilbert Godfried and Golum from Lord of the Rings) and his hysterical responses.	Name: Mark ? Nickname: Bigfoot Catch Phrase: It Is (at the end of every sentence) The newest member to the Wack Pack, he won his job in a New Wack Packer search. At first I didn't think he was all that great, but his multiple appearances have now grown on me. He's a big, slow guy who always ends his sentences with "it is."
Name: Riley Martin Claim To Faime: Author of "The Coming Of Tan" Catch Phrase: Uhhh... Riley is a curmudgeonly old man who can rattle off space alien bullshit like an artist. He also is constantly getting angry with Howard and the crew, which makes for good laughs. I can only take him in small doses, though.	Name: Alice ? Nickname: Crazy Alice Catch Phrase: Hi Fred To Alice, half the cast and crew of the Howard Stern Show are great and the other half she hates. And above everyone else, she hates Artie. Her yelling matches with him are hysterical, but again, another Wack Packer who's only good in small doses.
Name: Elliot Offen Nickname: Elegant Elliot Offen Catch Phrase: Right?! What couldn't be more entertaining than a fillabustering, gangster who dresses in drag? Elegant Elliot is one crazy character, and although he's not humorous, his craziness is hysterical to listen to. But even the crew of the show get fed up after awhile and most of his appearances end with them hanging up on him.	Name: Iris ? Nickname: Blue Iris Catch Phrase: This is better than rejuvination A pornstar nearing the age of 60 - Ugh. Her voice is real funny though. Artie's impression of her, which sounds like his impression of Jeff The Drunk is just as funny.
On The Fence
Name: Gary ?? Nickname: Gary the Retard Catch Phrase: none Gary is a mystery. He's a mentally retarded fan who says funny things when he talks. But one of his friends is Daniel Carver (see below) and when he talks to him on the phone (Howard plays these on the show) he gets real racist and aggresive and isn't funny. I wonder if that's the real Gary...
Can't Stand
Name: Roger Black Nickname: Yucko the Clown Catch Phrase: (horn beeps) Yucko the Clown's whole gimmick is he's a mean clown. Funny? Everything out of his mouth is racist humor, which is not funny to me, and he's one mean guy. Blah.	Name: Daniel Carver Nickname: none Catch Phrase: Wake up white people! Daniel Carver, like Yucko the Clown, is only on the show cuz of his racism. Except Daniel's is real. He's a (former?) member of the KKK. Obviously Howard has these people on to show how stupid racism is, but still, Daniel isn't even funny. Time to get rid of him.

Some good guests include George Takei ("Oh my!") and Gilbert Gottfried Most pictures from Howard Stern.com.

SteverOnline HomeStuff